Life is better when you have a few friends in your head…

Hey Hawkeye, want to go to the store with me?

Hey Hawkeye, want to go to the store with me?

Well, this was a pretty good week….for once. I was scrimping and saving all I could, barely buying any food or anything else for that matter, and when I went out to Walgreen’s on Thorsday Thursday I was assuming I was going to be overdrawn yet again.

I navigated through the bus terminal which is across from Walgreen’s and Subway, happy it was a beautiful day out and warm. Even I could not find anything to complain about. As I quickly walked from the bus I had just gotten off of and around the building to the other side where the street is, a batshitcrazy was yapping at the top of his lungs, talking to the air. As I passed him Clint was in my head “shit, go faster Cat, keep moving. He’s right on our tail.” I kept telling hm, “I know, okay? I know he’s gonna say something, just be quiet.”

Sure enough the guy starts rambling loudly to me as I pass him, the security guard standing there yapping on his phone, and all I hear is, “That’s right….you got it girl, you walkin the walk…” and then inaudible yammering about how I looked. I just laughed internally…..”Just once, just ONE freaking time, can I come over here, get my cigarettes and get the fuck home before one nutjob ruins my day?”  But no. I figured it was actually nice he wasn’t being mean or anything, and although it made me uncomfortable, the renta-cop was there with his gun in his belt which he’s probably never ever used.

I crossed the busy street to Walgreens, strutted my stuff inside and headed to the ATM to check my balance and get the cash for cigs…..printed the receipt….WTF? What??? I re-entered my info again and printed another receipt.

According to the bank receipt, I had waaaaaaay more than a minus number……and it was WAY good. Let’s just say I could get my car fixed, buy a bunch of nice clothes and eat out for over a month more, invite the Avengers to eat out too and still have a pocketful of money. Yes, my life is turning around. I took out $60 to get cigs and a drink, and printed yet another receipt to be sure I wasn’t dreaming. The amount was still there, minus the $60 and I was about to drop over in shock. I also had coupons, so I was pleasantly surprised when the girl at the counter was super sweet and tried to get me more bang (or smoke) for my money. She must have used three or four different scenarios to figure out the cheapest rate for me. In the end I used just the $2 coupon and was quite satisfied. I thanked her and left, still in awe and shock. When I got outside, I started to think about it and was convinced it was a mistake. How could I have all that money?

I raced back just in time to catch the bus back to my house, still trying to come up with how on earth I was so blessed. I thanked God profusely in my head, nearly in tears, but still too cautious to believe. There had to be something wrong and I would not touch it or mess with it until I knew for sure. When I got off the bus I walked down the alley to my apartment, giggling and crying and praying. God was listening, He always is of course, but maybe somehow things had made Him happy about me lately. “I’m working on something I love, blogging, and I’m trying to help other people with their mental problems, or just making them laugh, and I haven’t thought about asshat for a whole 6 hours, and I am trying to eat healthy, and and and”….. When I got to the back of the building, a neighbor and her friends were coming in. A man with her asked me, “Hey, lady, are you selling your car?” I said, “The Corolla? The white car?” He said, “yes.” I said, “Hell no! That’s my baby!

Honestly, I have had more Mexican people ask to buy my car than I’ve had husbands. And let me tell you, I’ve had 3. If I asked $5000 for my 15 year old car, I am pretty sure I would get it. But I don’t want to sell it. It’s the best damn car I’ve ever owned. It’s just that I can’t afford the damn tags right now, and Texas is super strict about inspections and stupid little things which of course break when the car is 15. SO I ride the bus, which isn’t bad because I have disability and a disabled bus pass so I only have to pay .30 cents each way. Cheaper than gas. And I get more exercise. Walking’s healthy right?      (Sorry, I used a Transformers quote there….)

So, when I got home I checked my mailbox, and sure enough there was a letter from Social Security and said they owed me a refund. A big fat, never had before refund. And it’s all MINE. I cried, I laughed, and I thought about how dumbass asshat ex wasn’t going to get one dime of it. His loss. My gain. I can now do what most people take for granted, and yeah, before you lecture me on cigs and not food, I don’t drink and it’s my escape. I actually have food, I just have basics like 3 bags of rice and a lot of beans. And I have been eating rice and beans since I moved to this shithole little Mexico and I don’t want any more rice and beans! Since my ex left I haven’t eaten one damn burrito, any beans or tortillas. It was nice when I didn’t have any choice, but I’m so over it now.

I realized that sometimes God sends the things we need when and if we need them, not when we want them. This “refund” was something we counted on last year and it never came. God wanted it to come for ME, when I needed it, and now it has, not for asshat to use to buy yet another piece of stupid Dj equipment, or light or whatever.

Today I had planned to go to Walmart.

I didn’t go to Walmart.

I was up until 6 am.

Wide freaking awake.


I thought about going to Walmart at 6 am. Less people, no lines, bus would be emptier, but somewhere between that thought and how hot my feet were in my slippersox, I fell asleep. I woke up way after 1 pm. Nope, Walmart not happening. Ok, plan B. Albertsons….grocery store. Take another different bus,  go to Albertsons, hmmmm. No. Don’t want to. How about just going to the damn Family Dollar and get a few things, and come back and order a pizza? I haven’t had pizza in months and I was planning to treat myself right.


Tony: What the hell? Where is she off to in such a hurry today?

Bruce: Shopping.

Clint: And then she said we are ordering pizza. A real freaking pizza! Not some shit she bought at the grocery store for $2, but a real pizza with melted cheese and everything!

Thor: Will I like pizza? What is it made from?

Cap: Oh, you’re going to enjoy this Thor. She said there is some ‘hut’ she’s getting it from, but honestly, I have no idea where it is. But you will love pizza. It’s an American staple.

Tony: It’s called Pizza Hut you goof. It’s a place where they make pizza and bring it to your house and you eat it.

Cap: Seriously? They bring it to you? How can it be hot? In Brooklyn we would go and watch the guys making it, tossing it up in the air, and then cutting it up in front of you.

Bruce: Yeah, they don’t do that anymore. At least not as much. This is more of a chain, they premake stuff, precook stuff and throw it on some premade dough and send it on it’s way through a machine now. Then a dorky looking guy comes to your house and charges you a month’s salary for it, a delivery charge and a tip, and taxes and so on, and it’s not as big as it should be, and definitely not hot anymore. Welcome to the new world Steve.

Cap: And you guys are excited about this? Why?

Clint: Because it’s pizza man! We never get pizza anymore. She’s always eating soup and sandwiches, and Ramen noodles and sometimes she gets creative and makes stir fry, but mostly she doesn’t eat much. She’s finally treating herself.

Tony: We are going to the dollar store. How exciting is that? She’ll talk herself out of buying everything even though its cheap stuff. God I would hate to be poor.

Natasha: I’ll make sure she buys at least one nice thing for herself. At least ONE.

Clint: Me too.


Me: I need new earbuds. The ones I have are crap. Sounds like my music is inside a tin can. These are nice, and they look comfortable. And they’re PINK!

Clint: Buy them. Buy them.

Me: Okay.

Clint: Wait, that was too easy. She’ll put them back before we check out….you’ll see.

Me: I am going to go up and down each and every aisle at my leisure. No rushing me, got it?

Tony: No, no. We’re with you. Just be sure you actually BUY something….

Me: Oh I will. You’ll see. Hmmm. Clothes….Here’s a nice shirt. $8 for this? Nope. Let’s keep looking……here’s one for $6. Got it. Okay, let’s move on……new lamp? No. New Curtains? Nope….I wish I could find some dirt. I want to plant some seeds. They don’t have any dirt yet. It is only February I guess…

Bruce: Pretty sad when you can’t buy dirt…..(grinning) It should be free.

Me: We live in sand hell. There is no dirt except on the ceiling fan ha ha.

Clint: Did you guys see her face when she was done cleaning the one in the living room the other night? She saw a black blob of dust on the wall and thought it was a huge spider! I laughed so hard, she was screaming and grabbed the broom and whacked at it like it was moving!

Natasha: What does she have against spiders anyway?

Bruce: Don’t ask. Probably why she doesn’t care for you much. She’s had some run-ins with several Black Widow spiders in the last few years. Be very afraid Nat. She might just hit you with that broom one day.

Me: Chicken nuggets…..potato tots……nope.

Tony: Oh for God sake! Buy the damn stuff. You want it, buy it. (muttering) buy it buy it buy it…

Me: Okay. Got them. Happy?

Tony: A little……

Me: Okay, I think I’ve got enough. Room spray, food, 2 diet Pepsi’s, canned soup, a shirt, earbuds, and some spices. I think I did okay?

Clint: Are you going to pay now? Really? You don’t want to look some more?

Me: No, if I keep going we –er, I won’t be able to carry all of this.

Thor: I would gladly carry your packages if it were possible Cat.

Me: That’s sweet Thor. No, I can manage. It’s not that far.

Clint: I can’t believe it. She did it. She walked out of the store with all of it! Way to go Cat!

Me: Thanks guys. I know I need to treat myself sometimes. Now let’s get home and order that pizza. I’m starving.

Cap: How long will it take?

Me: About 5 minutes to order, about 30 minutes to confirm it ten times, redo the order, then pay $20 for 2 stinking little pizzas, and about another hour till it comes.

Cap: Wait, what? $20 for pizza? You could just eat the chicken nuggets……I can’t believe this world anymore. Over an hour and a half for pizza and it’s $20. It better be worth it.

Clint: It’s PIZZA dude. Just try to be supportive here okay? And she has Pepsi! She never drinks her favorite soda anymore! i can’t believe she just spent $3 for two small bottles of Diet Pepsi! I am so damn proud right now……

Tony: I own stock in Pepsi. I could have gotten her a whole case full.

Clint: Shut up and just be glad she didn’t put anything back.



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