Monday……Armageddon

Today the you know what hit the fan. I won’t go into all of it but I did finally talk to my ex. Yes, EX. Forever and ever my ex now. He’s dropped the last straw on me and today I crumbled. Okay, maybe not. I spent the day on the phone, talking to various stupid machines, then called him. He acted all nan chelante  and I blasted him. Felt good to get some of it off my chest finally, but I was shaking like a leaf the whole time. After I called him “Dumbass” he hung up. Guess the truth hurts. Well, where the DUMBASS fits, wear it!

I may be seeing him within the next few days. Not looking forward to that. Not only do I have to see him, but now I have the police on standby. I just want his stuff gone and my keys back so I can move on. I have been texting my mom back and forth like crazy on Facebook so I am getting carpal tunnel syndrome back in my wrists. Ugh. I hate that. Just when I find an outlet, I can’t use it because it requires typing. And yeah, before you mention Dragon, been there done that. It can’t keep up and I usually have to go back and fix a lot of mistakes. I don’t like talking out loud anyway, so it defeats the purpose. I didn’t talk to the “guys” much today, because inside I was too busy screaming and I think it would have hurt their ears. LOL.

Last night I signed up for a Tumblr account and Pinterest. Don’t know what good it will do, but need to get this blog out there. And by the way, I just posted to Facebook, so it’s only a matter of time before I get “What happened? I thought you guys were sooooooo in love?” responses. I know my parents would prefer I sink into a quiet place and keep my mouth shut, but I just can’t anymore. People need to know, and I need to vent, share, and get as much backup as needed.  Besides, it’s not like I have mentioned his name or listed his address online. After what he did to me today, he’s lucky I haven’t. He just isn’t worth the time or text.But this is just the beginning. I knew it would come, I knew one day I would have to just decide once and for all if it was over. I don’t think my mom thinks it is. Let me tell you in any and every way possible, IT IS OVER. The only way, and I mean ONLY way I would ever even consider seeing him again, and I’m not talking about happy go lucky, back together shit, I mean SEEING him in a romantic way, would be for him to own up to his total lack of compassion, get on both knees, cry his eyes all over the place, and BEG me. And well, he will never do that because to him, he’s right and I’m wrong. He’s already claiming he only told the government that he moved. But in doing it he used me and my accounts and basically messed me up for the month. After 1 hour on the phone with Social Security, I am back on track. And him, well, he’s in for a shocker eventually. I told my mother I was going to go all New Yorker on him. And I will.

So…….the Monday curse continues…….

Below is something I found on Tumblr. I think it will help……..me and you if you are going through this:

Life Lessons Learned Through Dating Post-Divorcehuffingtonpost.com

Your daily dose of truth and wisdom:

1. Maya Angelou was right: When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time. If he speaks poorly of who he’s dated in the past, if he treats the valet like a serf or if he doesn’t bend down to pet a dog or greet a child, he’s not going to be someone I can respect.

2. Let your feelings inform your instinct. However, always let your instinct have the deciding vote; it can’t be manipulated.

3. People only change behavior they want to change, and even then, sometimes they’re not capable of it.

4. Don’t invest more in a person than they invest in you. Both of you need to make an effort to grow or establish a bond. The work should be relatively even-ish, depending on circumstances.

5. Human failings are just that—human. Forgive and move forward. If you can’t move forward, leave.

6. Be gentle with yourself when you’re feeling sensitive and don’t beat yourself up. Take care of yourself by being aware you may be reacting a little bit more emotionally than you normally would. As long as you own it, people (including yourself) are more apt to forgive.

7. You are inherently sexy. No one can take that away from you, not even yourself. Not everyone will be affected by your sexiness and those that will be might not always act on it. This is not personal. Rejection is not a sign there’s something wrong with you, because there isn’t. There are many factors involved in any given situation in life and attraction is no different.

8. No matter how perfect everything looks, if you find yourself saying things like, “On paper, this is ideal,” it probably isn’t. If at the end of the day you’re unhappy, it’s not working.

9. Your feelings should never be ignored, dismissed, argued with or taken lightly, especially by you. No matter what, even though it may feel uncomfortable, speak up. You must have your own back.

10. It’s usually never the situation that’s pissing you off, it’s the mindset behind the situation that’s pissing you off. Intention is everything. Even the sweetest words can have the cruelest meaning if spoken capriciously.

11. Endeavor to look at disappointment with broader strokes. Every time you are made painfully aware of what you don’t want, it makes what you do want even more clear-cut and defined. Take every failed date, relationship or flirtation as another brick that makes your ideal house stronger.

12. Words mean nothing without action. Seriously. I mean it. 100%. It’s as simple as that.

13. It’s all going to work out in the end. Just trust your instincts, keep boiling down what you want in order to be happy and learn to recognize the signs of what’s not going to work sooner than later.

# is way off. The situation, the idiot in the situation, the people behind the idiot in the situation……..they are all pissing me off trust me. Until the next pile of crap hits tomorrow, here’s what I will leave with……..a simple thought.

Salvation

My salvation

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