Home …Finally………

Me: I have no idea if the bus stops near my house.

Cap: (groans) I told you to take the other one!

Tony: (slaps Cap) I swear to God, let me out of here or I’m gonna blow a hole in this skull!

Hawkeye: I love looking at the scenery. Shit, this is a really crappy place…..where are the birds?

Me: They went to Florida for the winter. Or maybe they just realized how much this place sucks too.

Natasha: Don’t worry Clint, your pigeon girls will find you sooner or later. Personally, that’s not a question I need answered.

Banner: I lived in Calcutta. This place is worse. I could “clean it up for you”…..

Me: Thanks Bruce. I don’t think even you could fix this shithole.

Cap: Why don’t you like it here. The people seem friendly enough.

Me: No one speaks English here Cap. Spanish, Spanish, Spanish…..

(The bus stops at my stop. I walk toward my apartment, and pass a man on the street. He comments something in Spanish)

Me: “I’m sorry, I don’t speak Spanish.” (ugh)

Man: “Oh, you don’t speak Spanish. I was just saying “Happy New Year.”

Me: “Oh thanks, you too.”

(Walking on)……”shit”.

Tony: What’s wrong?

Me: I actually understood him in Spanish. I’ve got to move…

Cap: We’re home!!! Yippee!

Thor: This domicile does not suit you Catherine. You deserve much nicer accommodations. Gold and towers and monuments built to the sky….

Tony: Yeah, I have to agree. I have some room at my place..

Me: I hate cities Tony. This is just a smaller, crappier one than you live in.

Tony: (Gasps) How, how can you say such a thing? You were born in New York.

Me: I was born in Albany, New York. Not Manhattan. I am a suburban or country type of girl. I hate cities. Cold, hard, no grass, no air, all just huge buildings covering up the sky.

Tony: I don’t know you.….

Me: And I’m afraid of heights, so your tower—

Cap: You mean that big, ugly…….building?

Me: Yes Cap. Does it even have heat? All I saw were big open windows and doors you walk out of and nothing closed.

Tony: Yeah, but at least I don’t live in a dungeon.

Me: I don’t live in a dungeon, it’s home. For now anyway. I make the best of what I have…..You should try it.

Tony: I could build you a nicer dungeon. And I could add Jarvis so you’d never be lonely.

Me : (sniff) yeah, that sounds nice. But then I wouldn’t have you guys to keep me company.

Hawkeye: Awwww. That is just so sweet!


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